In the words of the inimitable Kanye West: “One good girl is worth a thousand b****es.”
Nearly six years ago, I managed to lock up a certified dime piece curvy goddess boss babe queen to be my girlfriend. A year later, she became my wife, and ever since then I’ve been on a mission to give her the world. Sarah Tripp inspires me, she is my muse, she is a huge motivation for me as I chase my dreams because I want to provide her the type of lifestyle she deserves. I promised Sarah early on in our relationship that one day I would be able to buy her anything her heart desires. It feels so good to be able to make good on that promise and I continue striving to make her feel like the queen she is. When you fall in love, it makes you want to be the best version of yourself, and it also makes you want to give the world to your partner. So many people have the attitude that being in a relationship will somehow tie you down or hold you back, but it’s the complete opposite. Being in love acts as a springboard for your hopes and dreams.
Over the years, I’ve picked up more than a few tips on how to treat my woman like a queen, and I’ve been asked countless times to write about it. So while a full book is obviously quite a tall order, I figured I’d jot down a few ways that all you guys out there can do better when it comes to treating your girl right. Because it’s a well known fact: when your girl is happy, life is good. When your girl ain’t happy, life is bad. Very bad indeed. So keep reading and hopefully you will find some inspiration and motivation to remind your lady why she chose you in the first place, and what you can do to keep that spark alive.
1. Make her feel BEAUTIFUL.
They say communication is the key in any relationship, and that comes in the form of compliments as well. Let your girl know how pretty her face is, when you like her outfit, how much you love her smile, how much you like to hear her laugh, anything. If you find yourself thinking how much you love her or appreciate something she did for you, TELL HER. As human beings, unfortunately we haven’t developed the ability to read each other’s minds. And considering men are from Mars and women are from Venus, the potential for things to get lost in translation is very high. Anyone who’s been in a serious longterm relationship knows how quickly things can be miscommunicated between men and women. We function differently, we think differently, we have different perceptions and viewpoints, so it’s natural there is going to be a little disconnect, sometimes more than others. A lot of this can be avoided by simply saying what’s on your mind. Take the time to acknowledge that your girl spent some extra time with that brow pencil and did her hair in a new style and bought a new pair of booties before heading out for date night. Make her feel beautiful, because she is.
2. Make her feel APPRECIATED.
Recognize all the things she does for you, because trust me my man, it’s a lot. Even though Sarah and I always joke about how she’s constantly asking me to help her while I’m already doing something to help her, I know that at the end of the day, she does so much for me. For me, after I’ve spent all day working at my laptop, editing photo and video, working on a hundred different projects at once, I just want to eat a good meal and watch a few episodes of The Office to unwind. But where does that good meal usually come from? Sarah. After she’s also worked a full day, just doing different things. When I fold the laundry in the basket that’s always at the foot of our bed, that’s just my half of a chore that Sarah always does by putting our clothes in the washer and dryer. And when I clean the juicer in the morning, it’s because she is nice enough to make us both a fresh juice that morning and leave mine in the fridge waiting for me. See what I mean? She does so much for me and sometimes I need to remind myself to acknowledge that and express to her how much I appreciate it. When I express my thanks to Sarah for all she does for me, I know it really means a lot to her and it’s always met with an increase in love and affection in our relationship. The quickest way to corrode a relationship is to neglect your partner and their efforts. When you ignore the little things that your partner does for you/your life together, you’re slowly adding bricks to a wall of indifference and even resentment between the two of you. On the other hand, expressing gratitude and offering selfless service will forge a bond that becomes impenetrable over time.
3. Make her feel VALUED.
You are teammates in this relationship. You are co-captains with the same amount of responsibility, you both deserve the same amount of respect, and neither of you is more invaluable to the team than the other. If one of you fails, your team loses. If one of you wins, the other is just as much a winner. Support your teammate in her goals and require the same of her. Listen to her thoughts, opinions, and suggestions. Discuss big decisions with her before making them. Sure, sometimes you’ll disagree. Hell, sometimes she’ll straight up tell you that you are crazy and she doesn’t want you to do whatever it is you want to do. We all know Adrian’s infamous line in Rocky IV before Rocky goes to Russia to avenge Apollo Creed’s death and fight the unstoppable Russian monster Ivan Drago: “It’s suicide! You’ve seen him, you know how strong he is! You can’t win!” In instances like this, it’s easy to think that our teammate is no longer supporting us and become angry, defensive, and/or dismissive. As an enthusiastic entrepreneur and creative mind who gets really excited about new ideas/projects, there have been plenty of times where Sarah has pulled an Adrian and essentially told me “you can’t win!” It always hurts in the moment, but it’s only after we both calm down and remember we’re on the same team, that I realize this is just her way of expressing certain worries or fears that I haven’t considered. Once I express to her that I value her input and think about ways to get on the same page rather than be defensive, that’s when we can start moving forward again. Listen to your girl, she’s intelligent, she’s perceptive, and most of all, she wants what’s best for you. And that’s why you locked her up in the first place.
4. Make her feel DESIRED.
Women are incredible. Their bodies literally create life. They are divine goddesses. Respect them as such. Celebrate them. Worship them. My love for Sarah and her curvy body is well-documented. For hell’s sakes, I’ve literally been dubbed the Curvy Wife Guy by the internet lol. Jokes aside, my love for Sarah runs deep and extends into many different directions, like the roots of an old oak tree. My attraction to her physically is just one of these important tentpoles of my love for her. There is nothing more attractive to me than her beautiful curvy figure: thick thighs, fat booty, big boobs, soft tummy rolls, beautiful stretch marks, etc. She is a picture of soft, feminine beauty. I’ve always said: The person you fall in love with will redefine the word ‘beauty’ for you; your definition becomes what they are. So make her feel like it! Your girl deserves to feel sexy and desired when she’s with you. Give her a playful booty squeeze when she’s looking good. Buy her a new lingerie set on fun occasions like birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas eve, etc. Have sex somewhere new and spontaneous. Send her a flirtatious text. Reaffirm to her daily that you celebrate and worship every inch of her body. Kiss her stretch marks. Hug her soft belly and tell her how much you love it. Give her a kiss that means something rather than just a quick peck on the lips as you run out the door. She is your queen, and without your queen you cannot be a true king. Keep the spark alive in your relationship by reinforcing your attraction to her daily and she’ll have the confidence not only in the bedroom but in every facet of her life.
5. Make her feel HEARD.
I already mentioned the age-old adage that men are from Mars and women are from Venus. (For those not familiar with the origin of this phrase, it comes from the title of one of the best-selling relationship/psychology/self-help books of all time in the 1990s. The book asserts that many problems in relationships stem from the fact that men and women think and express themselves much differently based on a variety of different factors.) We all have our own personality quirks and bad habits, but I can’t think of anything more damaging in a relationship, or in any interaction for that matter, than not being heard. At the risk of sounding cliche, it seems to ring true with most couples we’ve interacted with: men tend to think logically, whereas women tend to think emotionally. When your girl is expressing something that makes her feel sad, mad, stressed, etc., it’s important not to write it off as silly or “dramatic.” I’ve made this mistake many times and it’s something I’m really trying to work on: acknowledging that my wife is feeling a certain way, and trying to help her through it, regardless of if I perceive the situation the same way. When your girl feels heard in her thoughts and feelings, communication opens up even further in your relationship and there’s so much more room for love to grow. You should be a refuge for your girl, a safe space where she can share any and all emotions. Listen, sympathize, and do your best to validate her emotions before trying to “solve” or “correct” them. At the end of the day, we all just want to be heard.
I hope this gives you some ideas on how to make your queen feel extra special today and every day. If you are lucky to have a beautiful woman in your life, hold on to her. She may be a backseat driver or eat half your food every time you order something, but she’s worth it. Every king needs a queen, and together you can do anything.
We out here.